I get a lot of blog spam. Some of it is the usual ‘Buy V1gra!’ ads with very little attempt hide it’s purpose. Sometimes these are fake friendly comments with links to seedy websites telling me in various degrees of coherent english that it is a “Great post, this person agree at link X”. Sometimes these spam messages have gotten more creative, being made of huge blocks of stolen text interspaced with random medication related links so they resemble some sort of post-modern fiction experiement. Recently, however, the comment spam has all been from one bot trying to push various medicines. Each one lists what the pill does in fairly good english, but includes a great deal of randomness in the “If you have X, don’t use Y” list. He’s the highlights:
*Suicidal or already having a suicide shot at.
*Preggers or trying to be productive
*pregnant or infuriating to get in a family way
*if you have alcohol containing drinks
*pregnant or annoying to regain having a bun in the oven
*Bipolar or having the story bipolar
*Chron’s bug
*irregular heartbeat or heart plague
*sentiment fit out
*ISOTRETINOIN treats glowering acne
*if you commonly swig rot-gut containing drinks
*thyroid muddle
*mental problems, such as depression, psychosis, attempted suicide, or a strain retailing of loony problems
*eye or delusion problems, including a rare inherited vision infirmity called retinitis pigmentosa
*fecund or troublesome to get having a bun in the oven
*bend the elbow more than 3 booze containing drinks a time
*an freakish or allergic reply to ketorolac, aspirin, other NSAIDs, other medicines, foods, dyes, or preservatives
*pregnant or worrying to retrieve significant
*an hooch libel pretty pickle
*downcast stomach acid staging
*pregnant or fatiguing to pick up in the pudding club
*sentiment condition
*mental problems, such as dejection, psychosis, attempted suicide, or a family retailing of off one’s rocker problems
And at the bottom of every list-
*breast feeding